1. Fast walk at all crosswalks as if a motorbike is about to run you over. Because one probably will. Do not get distracted by street fights. Do not comment on how many Starbucks there are. Do not trust street signs.
2. Laundry can dry literally anywhere.
3. Leashes are optional for dogs, but coordinated outfits are mandatory.
4. Why buy a broom when you can just make one out of sticks?
5. Stay safe by locating all fire hydrants next to each other.
6. Come prepared with your best side-eye. Here Layla demonstrates what faces NOT to make.
7. Faux old world Chinese architecture isn’t fake if you’re actually in China.
8. Be a dumpling pro by spilling its crab juice on yourself and then immediately dropping it on the ground. The 5 second rule does not apply.
9. Supplement the world’s tallest hotel by building a taller one a few years later.
10. Finally, take all written instructions literally.
Lady Boy Time 
In the photo prior to the dumpling drop, are you and Random Guy wearing the same jacket?
Ha maybe. Didn’t notice.
Totally squirted a soup dumpling all over myself just a few hours ago. They should come with warning labels.
It’s a rite of passage. Like the first time you jam a whole one in your mouth and bite down.